My new thing is to not let other people get under my skin- to, if I have to "wash that man/woman/those people" right out of my hair - those people who like lice are determined to to get in there, burrow in and stay for the long haul, sucking out my precious nutrients. I've got to figure out a nice way, in effect, to be a b**ch. Maybe a shirt that says I'm not as young or as nice as I look- to those who doubt my professional abilities or overestimate my naivete. This has always been a problem for me- I'm young, nice and usually have a position of responsibility. Here's the problem for others-those who are older, "not so nice" and have earned no responsibility, but feel they deserve mine and most importantly, any perks that come with them. There are people who apparently can tell just by looking at me that my life has been a bed of roses, and so have decided by comment consent to be thorns in my side. I wish I were a person who didn't care, who could flip the world the bird and keep going. Because contrary to all sense, the world seems to admire people like that. It seems, in fact, sometimes to encourage that kind of bravado, machismo ( I don't know a feminine word for machismo-note to self; I must find that word and use it in conversation at least once.)And I want some of that swagger.It's not enough to tell myself that people don't know better, don't know my issues, don't know my sorrows (can you hear singing in the background? "Nobody knows the trouble I've seen.....) Ok, maybe I don't really have it that bad, or maybe, just maybe I've just been really working that hard. Yeah-----I think that's it. And a little recognition is so little to give when it means so much. I know I can't expect others to appreciate what I'm going through, but every once in a while, it would sure be nice if the world would give me a break. Or failing that, that I had enough Thatchers to take one for myself. Ok, so maybe I don't have enough spite to tell the world to bite the big one, but I can surely strike back at those who keep taking rabbit punches at me. There's one surefire way to do it- and it's guaranteed to make the haterz crazy. I'll keep doing what I'm doing- succeeding, one jab at a time, giving it all I've got and leaving it all in the ring. They can't stand that or anyone who doesn't have time for the bile. Life is too short to focus on the negativity, and I'm too far ahead to let someone pull me down. It seems like such a simple thing, but in the end that's truly all it takes to mark the winners from the losers- just check which direction they're looking in. It's already been decided. I'm in it for the long haul. I just have to work to believe that the fight is already won.
"Criticism is something we can avoid easily;
by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing."
Don't know about you, but that's not my style, so I'll have to keep on keepin' on. Hope you will too.