Sunday, January 10, 2010

There's Something About....Continuity or DIY: New Year's Resolutions

There's something to be said about continuity- the ties that bind, the family chains, the traditions that year after year remain the same. Looking around at my family this Christmas, I realized that I was lucky enough to be seeing four generations of women in my family- all of whom have my mother's smile. Talk about your genetic inheritance.  It made me happy to be part of something bigger than myself, something that has continued and will continue in my line-if I get the lead out. Hence the completion of another tradition- the New Year's Resolution, and with it the inevitable procrastination.
( So, yes, I know I am a few..days [ Ed.s note- weeks]..ahem,... days late.]

I hereby declare my New Years Resolutions-
 in keeping with that great tradition in which we strive to better ourselves- at least for a few months.

[ author's note: at least until the champagne wears off.] 
[Ed.s note- can you resolve to be a little less sarcastic?!]  
[ Author's note- No.]

1. No more procrastinating!
[Yeah, I know, but I have to start somewhere! Besides, tradition and all that? "raised eyebrows"

2. I will get into better shape this year!
[I will do five sit ups- instead of the one I do getting out of bed. How's that? Good start, huh?]

3. I will save money this year!
[Instead of spending it on books, I will spend it on food instead. Food is still cheaper than books, right? Oh wait, the recession thing-forgot, sorry.]

4. I will plan for my future!
 [At this time tomorrow, I plan to be eating fried chicken. 
Mmmm, chicken. "Homer Simpson slobber"]

5. I will have better relationships!
 [Read; I will not slap the bejeezus out of everyone I meet. This years quota- hmmm...two out of every five. ]

6. I will be more organized!
[As soon as I find my keys, purse, phone and oh, yeah, this New Years list-conveniently enough, lost, in the purse. Yeah, baby, we are Professional Grade!]

Hmm, maybe I'd better stop this list right there-I'm getting a little depressed. That normally doesn't set in until a month after I've failed at completing all my resolutions.  Maybe this year, I'll set some simpler, yet grander goals. Ok, let's start over.

My New New Year's Resolutions
1. I won't procrastinate on things that are important-like friends, family and relaxation. 
Everything else can wait.

2. I will get into better shape this year-mentally. Living in a culture that celebrates people who don't look like me is no excuse. My brain is the top model out there. This year I resolve to show off my curves a little more.

3. I will save money this year- for important things like books, travel, and fun. Instead of being stingy with myself and paying doctors to "fix" me when I end up stressed, I'm going to save on medical bills and enjoy my life. [And yeah, set aside some money for an IRA, geez.]

4. I will plan for my future-starting with a new vision board. [Don't know what a vision board is? You don't watch enough Oprah-look it up.] Dreaming is important and having a long view of what success is enables one to be flexible. My immediate goal- to start a business, and start a family. However that happens is fine with me- but the intention has to be there. Therefore I will immediately start sending out my intentions to the universe- no more small dreams. I want an empire! [And if you think dreaming isn't hard when everyone's favorite game is crushing them, you've got another thin{k} coming!]

5. I will have better relationships- starting with romance and going on to all the relationships in my life. The older I get, the more it becomes clear that relationships with other people can make your life fuller, richer, and more meaningful. I deserve to be loved no matter what, but like any gardener, you reap what you sow. This year I resolve to sow more seeds of friendship. [ and some spices know."wink"]

6. I will be more organized- now my clutter will be in distinct piles. Important-letters to family. Not important-bills. Hurray for direct deposit and ...well, no hurray for direct debit, but it's a good feature anyway. "grump". This year I will be more organized in my home, my thoughts, and my heart. They say "home is where the heart is" and a clean house reflects a clean and open heart. I want my door to be open for anyone who comes in so...let's get out the vacuum.

Ok- that sounds a lot better...and a lot more doable.  Maybe having resolutions isn't such a bad idea- a tradition of setting aside the bad, the failures and the disappointment, in favor of optimism and hope? Yeah, that's a tradition I can get with. And top it all of with a champagne toast- to the past, and to the future, to friends, family and accomplishments to come.

I would like to make a toast to lying, stealing, cheating and drinking. 
If you’re going to lie, lie for a friend.
 If you’re going to steal, steal a heart. 
If you're going to cheat, cheat death. 
And if you’re going to drink, drink with me.

I gotta feelin', that this is gonna be the best year yet. 

[Ed.s note- This year I resolve to help our "author" find more appropriate quotes.. To stop her from using exclamation marks excessively. And to not be too unduly offended by human nature. Happy New Year-"sigh"

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