Friday, January 29, 2010

“Where cat is, there is civilization” : or Nice Pussy

It is an old saw that says women are a lot like cats. Pet them and they’ll purr for you, but rub them the wrong way and they’ll bite. Well, it’s true I do purr when rubbed the right way- (I’m an unacknowledged snuggle bunny-know anyone who wants a pet?)but I don’t bite- I’m still on my milk teeth and haven’t learned how yet. But in essence, the old saw is true : for everyone. Everyone likes to be petted, to be touched in appreciation, and nobody likes to be rubbed on the raw. The sad part is that we don’t learn from cats when to bite- we often do it inappropriately ( and usually not to the person who hurt us- accumulating bad karma)- some of us never learn how at all, and let the world walk all over us. Everyone knows that in ancient Egypt cats were worshipped as gods- especially cats. Because they’re smart they still expect to be treated like gods- it’s just we humans who haven’t gotten with the program. There is wisdom to be extracted here, if you pay attention to animal nature. Relationships are an excellent example of evolution in action. Observe. In packs there must be a leader, or else there is mob rule- (human packs that is. Animal packs have more sense.) The order of hierarchy is clear in the wild. The animal that acts like the pack leader, is. Now, a corollary is that you may have to fight to prove it. In which case, like cats, fight the dirtiest way you know how. This is often a problem for women (some women- not all)because we are raised to believe that fighting is wrong- despite the fact that every animal does it (and despite an obvious fact of nature- that women especially are good at it.)But in the fight for pack domination the object is not to be polite- the point is to win. Women often hold the short straw when it comes to physical fighting. Unless we train hard, we are in general, less likely to come out of a fight still looking pretty. So we use the weapons available to us..and pick our battles. A high heeled shoe used in just the right place can often stop a fight in its tracks- ( and sweep out your dirty mind. I don’t mean like that! While I encourage women to fight dirty when necessary- always make sure it’s necessary- then, be a gentleman- put him down fast, quick and in a hurry and make sure he stays down. Men are in general more fragile than women in many ways- if you must damage his “ego”- be kind and put him down afterward- or you’ve just guaranteed yourself trouble in the future. Back to our regularly scheduled program.) As I was saying, a high heeled shoe at the right time can stop a fight in its tracks- whether used seductively, as a weapon or a prod. Cat wisdom; a cat is treated like a god because it expects to be. As one of Robert Heinlein’s characters once said (Heinlein- one of the few men I believe really understood women..and appreciated all aspects)-“If a man fails to hold a door for me, I fail to see when my heel lands on his instep. A lady has doors held for her, because she expects it.” Win just that one battle, and you have won the war.

By the same token, a gentleman is a gentleman everywhere at everytime- whether someone is watching or not, or else he is no gent leman- follow me? A man who puts on airs is a liar. And while honest liars have their place, incompetent ones have only one. Down the chute. Either a man is a true gentleman…or he is a rogue. Now, rogues have their uses. Why, Washington couldn’t run without them. Nevertheless, when talking about relationships, women should beware rogues as much as possible. And when you simply have to deal with them walk in with eyes open- be polite, shake hands… and count your fingers afterwards. But a true gentleman will always act as if he sees every woman as a lady, even those who manifestly are not. And again, win that battle and you have won the war. No woman-(intelligent woman at any rate) will ever argue that she isn’t a lady, even if she is in fact a guttersnipe. If he does this simple thing-sees himself as a gentleman, through seeing the best in others, he will guarantee himself an easy life with no stress, and as much love as he can accept. Every woman adores a man who puts her on a pedestal (while occasionally taking her down for a spin.)

If every woman were a lady, and every man a gentleman, the sexes could live together easily, no huhu. Unfortunately, it is obvious that we suffer from a lack of both..when there is no need.

You see, it is easy to be a god if one sees oneself as such. Cats know it. Some humans know it, though sadly not enough. And when you are a god and know it, it is easy to be loving and to dispense that love- a truly loving person has a self respect that is obvious. And because of it, has the respect of others. A cat who rubs against you has no more need of you than it has a piece of wood. It loves because it can- and can go away just as easily with no love lost or loss of self respect. Cats are the embodiment of graciousness- a healthy sense of self bolstered by a certain knowledge of their place in the universe- top of the food chain. In every human you have ever admired, you will find that each had a certain sense of place- may admit to having a certain feeling of greatness- whether acquired through life or inborn in the womb, that let them feel they were in for great things. And so great things came to them. (This is not to discount hard work. But knowing that great things are coming is a great motivator for getting ready beforehand and preparation is a key to success. ) In summary, know thyself and know that you are a god ( a benign one) and you will be one-practice magnanimity, be gracious, gentlemanly (or ladily*) and most of all, loving. Pet others and let them pet you, but bite when you sense you’re being taken advantage of. A little nip teaches respect. Most of all, be able to love and walk away, with no loss of love or self respect. Do all this and life will be milk and catnip, foreverand ever amen.

Love, purr, and peace

Jim Davis:

Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.

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